I feel like I've been in a bit of a life rut lately.
Not in a what am I doing with my life/ why am I here kind of rut...but a
Why am I treating every meal like it's a wing eating contest kind of rut.
In the past I have written a little bit about how it's hard to be motivated for me to go to the gym.
I've written about how I love food a little too much.
The last thing I want to do is whine about having body image issues when a lot of people have similar issues but get up and do something about it.
That's what I'm struggling with the most.
How do I become one of those people who gets up and does something about it?
I've been able to do Weight Watchers for awhile and then I literally watch as my weight goes back to where it was before.
(See what I did there?)
If there is a cookie offered to me at any point in time I will eat it---even if I'm not hungry.
Because it's a cookie, and I don't want that cookie to think it's not good enough.
What if that cookie has a family it needs to support?
You're saying to yourself--But Jones that makes no sense.
Well it does to me when I'm chomping on that whole cookie clan.
I don't want to be why the cookie economy goes down the tubes.
I don't want that on my conscious.
I celebrate with food.
I eat when I'm upset.
I so badly want to be that person that wants to go for a run when they've had a bad day at work.
I'm tired of being the person who eats a bag of Cool Ranch Doritos on their couch watching the latest Tivo'd "Ellen" episode.
I don't want to feel extra crummy about myself when I see my friends celebrating their happy lifestyles and their own weight loss.
I also don't want to toast their fitness triumphs with an actual piece of toast anymore.
I want to not think that life without diet soda is a life that isn't worth living.
I want to understand what it means to eat clean.
I'm assuming that doesn't mean eating straight after a bath but I've been wrong before...
It shouldn't be a long thought out process whether or not you want to get fit.
I just want this time to stick so bad.
The only time I remember staying with a routine was when I had something to work towards.
Sure I'm always working towards wearing only Beyonce leather "Single Ladies" leotards to work Monday thru Friday but I needed a more attainable goal.
Two years ago my biff fo life Sara and I ran a 5k for a cupcake.
We worked hard for it to and I can remember how proud we were of ourselves when we finished it.
So we promised each other that we would sign up for the Wicked 10k in Virginia Beach this October.
We shook on it &
I feel like if I blog about it then it makes it real.
It also puts it out into the universe that I'm ready to start feeling better about myself.
Adam Levine won't enjoy dates if they only consist of me crying into my Olive Garden bread sticks.
Yes in my dreams of dates with Adam Levine we go to Olive Garden.
I'm lucky that I have some really supportive friends in my life because they keep telling me it will.
My friend Kim said, "Do you want to run?"
My answer was, "Yes."
Her response, "Then you'll do it."
My best friend Sara K. has been an amazing cheerleader and understands what it means to have 5 points left for the day but a 30 point kinda hunger monster lurking in belly.
She has offered to be my support system so many times and now I'm finally taking her up on it.
I'm giving myself permission to be flustered, to mess up, to be OK with where I am now but also understand that in order for me to look like an "after" photo I can't and won't give up on myself.
I know that I don't usually write about heavy stuff (no pun intended) but I just thought that I needed to find a place to hold myself accountable and for some weird reason, writing it on the world wide web seems like to be the perfect way to do just that.
Not in a what am I doing with my life/ why am I here kind of rut...but a
Why am I treating every meal like it's a wing eating contest kind of rut.
In the past I have written a little bit about how it's hard to be motivated for me to go to the gym.
I've written about how I love food a little too much.
The last thing I want to do is whine about having body image issues when a lot of people have similar issues but get up and do something about it.
That's what I'm struggling with the most.
How do I become one of those people who gets up and does something about it?
I've been able to do Weight Watchers for awhile and then I literally watch as my weight goes back to where it was before.
(See what I did there?)
If there is a cookie offered to me at any point in time I will eat it---even if I'm not hungry.
Because it's a cookie, and I don't want that cookie to think it's not good enough.
What if that cookie has a family it needs to support?
You're saying to yourself--But Jones that makes no sense.
Well it does to me when I'm chomping on that whole cookie clan.
I don't want to be why the cookie economy goes down the tubes.
I don't want that on my conscious.
I celebrate with food.
I eat when I'm upset.
I so badly want to be that person that wants to go for a run when they've had a bad day at work.
I'm tired of being the person who eats a bag of Cool Ranch Doritos on their couch watching the latest Tivo'd "Ellen" episode.
I don't want to feel extra crummy about myself when I see my friends celebrating their happy lifestyles and their own weight loss.
I also don't want to toast their fitness triumphs with an actual piece of toast anymore.
I want to not think that life without diet soda is a life that isn't worth living.
I want to understand what it means to eat clean.
I'm assuming that doesn't mean eating straight after a bath but I've been wrong before...
It shouldn't be a long thought out process whether or not you want to get fit.
I just want this time to stick so bad.
The only time I remember staying with a routine was when I had something to work towards.
Sure I'm always working towards wearing only Beyonce leather "Single Ladies" leotards to work Monday thru Friday but I needed a more attainable goal.
Two years ago my biff fo life Sara and I ran a 5k for a cupcake.
We worked hard for it to and I can remember how proud we were of ourselves when we finished it.
So we promised each other that we would sign up for the Wicked 10k in Virginia Beach this October.
We shook on it &
I feel like if I blog about it then it makes it real.
It also puts it out into the universe that I'm ready to start feeling better about myself.
Adam Levine won't enjoy dates if they only consist of me crying into my Olive Garden bread sticks.
Yes in my dreams of dates with Adam Levine we go to Olive Garden.
I'm lucky that I have some really supportive friends in my life because they keep telling me it will.
My friend Kim said, "Do you want to run?"
My answer was, "Yes."
Her response, "Then you'll do it."
My best friend Sara K. has been an amazing cheerleader and understands what it means to have 5 points left for the day but a 30 point kinda hunger monster lurking in belly.
She has offered to be my support system so many times and now I'm finally taking her up on it.
I'm giving myself permission to be flustered, to mess up, to be OK with where I am now but also understand that in order for me to look like an "after" photo I can't and won't give up on myself.
I know that I don't usually write about heavy stuff (no pun intended) but I just thought that I needed to find a place to hold myself accountable and for some weird reason, writing it on the world wide web seems like to be the perfect way to do just that.





















